Tuesday, November 10, 2009

The Scene in My Front Yard

What's in My Front Yard

I took this picture five minutes ago. That car down there on the right belongs to one of the artists doing some work for Matt. It has been raining here, steadily, since last night. The dude tried to back out of our driveway, which curves, but he went straight, completely left the pavement, and then couldn't get any traction on the wet grass, which then became mud. I bet that part of the yard is going to look awesome in the morning. If the HOA didn't like the imperceptible bare spot on the other side of our driveway, they are really going to want to see this.

What you can't tell from the picture is that, happily, he didn't run into the power box concealed in that pampas grass, and he didn't run over our neighbor Mindy's flower bed. You do not want to mess with that woman's roses. So it could have been worse. I came outside when both Matt and his friend were standing there, soaking wet, trying to shove boards under the front tires. I couldn't believe that the car was completely off the driveway. "Crappity crap crap CRAP!" I thought. But what I said was, "Oh well, why don't y'all go get us some Wendy's?" Because I am well-bred like that, people.

Then I looked up the Weight Watchers point value of an order of Wendy's fries. But that is a whole 'nother story.

Another rain vignette from my day: Hank likes to "help" me roll the giant trashcan out to the street, which is tricky in perfect weather conditions, and not at all a fun time in the rain. So he had his raincoat and Croc Mammoths on, and I had my raincoat and Uggs, so we went to the side of the house to get the trash can. I tried to pick up a cardboard box that had somehow fallen onto the ground, to throw it into the can, but of course the cardboard was wet, AND the box had been filled with trash, so the box fell apart and I had to spend a few minutes picking Kleenex and candy wrappers out of the mud at the base of the trashcan. While I was doing this with my free hand, the umbrella I was holding in my other hand got entangled in the holly tree beside the house. I had to tug it loose, which meant shaking the wet holly branches all over myself, a lot. Hank said, "Mama, why are you DOING that?" Yes, why?

Then he scampered off and stood in the gutter, letting the water run into his shoes. Which again, were not ordinary rubber Crocs, but the Crocs with the wooly lining. You might be surprised at how much water those linings hold. To paraphrase Anchorman, I mean, I wasn't even mad, because it was amazing.


Cassie said...

Holy geez. I hope the situation has been resolved.

And I also hope you got your Wendy's fries.

Also, "I'm in a glass case of emotion!"

Amy said...

Wow! Exciting events in the cul-de-sac. In that dude's defense, I will say that backing down your driveway IS tricky. And it is amazing that he didn't hit the big box thingy.

Hope the damage isn't too terrible. Be sure to post any notices you get from the HOA, though!

Love the description of you and Hank taking out the bin. Very slapstick!

A Day That is Dessert said...

Oh my goodness; what a night! And you totally crack me up :) Next time I bet you'll buy the unlined crocs.

Mad Woman said...

Woah. Your grass is going to suck! Hope it's not too bad!

gretchen said...

I grew up right at the curve of a rather busy Ranch Road. Every time it iced up, we'd end up with three or four cars stuck in our yard. Mama would just make a big pot of coffee in the morning to prepare. But the Wendy's idea is far more satisfying.

The Dental Maven said...

Sounds like a perfect day.

Kelly said...

I love my Crocs with the fur...sorry about your yard =( I was trying to think of something clever to add here, too early in the morning for that.

Michele said...

Step away from the Wendys. That is like eating a weeks worth of points.

Amy said...

Do post the letter from the HOA, because I am all about irritating those with sullen scraps of power.

I'm still laughing about "Mama, why are you doing that?" -- I can just PICTURE it, the umbrella, the mud... oh, law. Hoo-ee.

Gretchen, I love your mama makin' up a big pot o java for all the company soon to arrive.

Ginny Marie said...

I can't leave the house to put the garbage cans on the curb without at least one little helper! I just don't see the fascination with having to go EVERYWHERE Mommy goes. I'll probably miss it when they grow up and don't like me anymore!

Michele Renee said...

I really feel for the artist guy. I am a failure at backing out of curvy driveways. Even in daylight and dry pavement. Several of my sons' friends have curvy driveways and I drop them off at the bottom saying, "I can't do driveways so here you go."

Sara said...

Sometimes I swear umbrellas are about as useless as _______. I was gonna say tits on a boar hog, but you can add your own fun phrase. But I swear they get you wetter with all the drippage and shaking than you would've been without.

Somehow I turn part cat when it rains and I can't stand for any part of me to get wet.

So your description of the trash can and wet cardboard box stuff was making me cringe! Wet kleenex-Agh!!

kathy said...

Did you eat the fries or not? I'm always doing a Scarlet's, "Tomorrow is another day" after I've eaten the fries.

Sorry you're experiencing the effects of dear IDA. She left quite a bit of rain in this area also.

Becky said...

We use that "tits on a boar hog" expression in family too. I learned it at my mother's knee.

And Matt brought me a large-sized Wendy's fries. Goodness! I ate a few and then had him move it to the other side of the table where I couldn't reach. So, crisis averted!

Oh, and the tow truck did get the car off our lawn, and it looks pretty bad, but it's still too wet to really tell.

danajk said...

My parents have a driveway that trips people up. My Daddy actually placed reflectors on all the trees to avoid people ending up in the front yard. It sort of looks like a landing strip when you are heading out at night.

I ♥ Ron!

A Lawyer Mom's Musings said...

I have a hard time backing out of my driveway sober, with no rain. And it's much shorter than yours!

Then again, the neighbor's kid had a hard time too. Crunch, he went, right into my car, this weekend. Lovely. Given my skill set, though, I was totally empathetic.