Saturday, August 29, 2009

Hot Friday Night Action

Right. In the midst of our Friday evening, children asleep, ice cubes melting in drinks, everything cozy, Matt leapt to his feet as though jerked by a string. "My fantasy football draft is in ten minutes," he hollered. Then he ran from the room. Now I know how Jessica Simpson must feel.

So here I am, Reader. Before I go to bed, I offer you a few moments from my day.

1) Today I was driving the kids somewhere. In the backseat, Laura mused, "I wonder if I will ever love anyone as much as I love myself?" That made me smile, there in the driver's seat, though she couldn't see my face. I thought of several different things I wanted to say in response, like, "You know, I used to wonder the exact same thing," or "It makes me really happy that you feel such love for yourself." But I just went with, "I am pretty sure that you will." And she said, "That's hard."

2) Later, with Laura away at a friend's for a sleepover, Hank was slightly drunk on the undivided attention of both of his parents. He said, "Raise your hand if you want to do something awesome!" Matt and I shot our hands into the air. Hank just sat there looking at us. He had nothing. Little buddy's not so good with follow-up.

3) I mentally composed an open letter to TJ Maxx. It was this:

Dear TJ Maxx,

I wanted to let you know, about that Polish pottery you sell back there in the dishes, you know, this stuff?

Yes, it's lovely, yes, I have the little pitcher with the Christmas tree motif, I like it very much. But what I wanted to say is, you've been carrying this stuff in every TJ's I've ever been in for about 12 years now. Everyone who wanted this pottery has now purchased it, I promise you. Seriously. So if you could be an angel and either show us something new, or demote this to the bottom shelf, I wouldn't have to get down and put a knee on the floor to look at the Denby.

Your friend,

4) This morning I got confused for a minute and forgot that Jude Law and Chris Martin of Coldplay aren't the same person. Does this happen to you with celebrities? And I was thinking about how Jude Law has knocked up a girl from Pensacola, my hometown, and I was feeling sad about it on Gwyneth Paltrow's behalf. Then I remembered that she's married to a totally different person from Jude Law. So then I just felt kinda proud of Pensacola. I mean, who ever thought that one of us Panhandle girls would get impregnated by the likes of Jude Law? He's so sophisticated! I mean, now that we're on the map, who knows where this could lead? Maybe somebody from Okaloosa County could get groped by that Edward Cullen guy.

Obviously I need to go to bed now. We're home for the first weekend in a while. Hope y'all enjoy yours!


Meghan said...

I will say, while your composition to TJ Maxx made me laugh and laugh...I think you are flat wrong! Oh dear. There, I said it! Do you have any idea the following that Polish pottery has? And how enormously expensive it usually is? Like $90 for a small serving dish, if you're lucky. It can go much higher. I had no idea that TJ Maxx even carried Polish Pottery, and now I might go out and pick some up this very minute! They should owe you commission. :0

Michele said...

Getting knocked up by Jude Law? Now, that's what I call a very close brush with greatness.

Anonymous said...

You're children are fabulous! I hope Hank came up with something eventually.

Bex said...

your kids are so cool!

i think that jude law impregnating someone other than his wife (or wife to be, in these modern times) cuts his sophistication value down a great deal. after all, responsibility can be very attractive on the right person!

Keely said...

Well, Hank never defined what said awesomeness would BE. He just asked if you were up for it.

Becky said...

Meghan, go get you some, girl, before they read my letter and it's all gone! LOL. Yes, it is nice, the Boleslawiec stuff. But I'm wondering if it's like that Italian Deruta pottery? With Deruta, some of it is very fine and VERY expensive, and people collect it and all, but increasingly, there's stuff in TJ's that says "Deruta" on the bottom, and that looks like Deruta, but way way cheaper, and if you put one of the cheaper pieces next to the expensive one, you can see a difference in quality. I don't know if that stuff is Deruta or not.

Anyway, it seems like the same thing might be going on with this Polish pottery. Some of it is very fine, and some of it isn't. I'm not sure what it's selling for these days. Maybe you can get lucky and the pottery that's actually in TJ's is the really good stuff?

I get a little worked up over this topic. Going to a discount pottery and glass store is like going to church for me.

Anonymous said...

I love your daughter's thoughts. And I'm being subjected to the Falcons/ Chargers game right now. sigh.

Amy said...

Those kids--God love 'em! I think Hank had something totally awesome in mind, but decided that maybe you and Matt weren't *really* up for it.

Meghan said...

Becky, is very possible you're right about the quality of Polish Pottery that TJMaxx sells, because depending on which part of Poland it comes from (and the artist)...some of it is a-maze-ing, and some of it is just not all that exciting. As I think on TJ Maxx, I somehow find it difficult to believe that the majority of their selection is the good stuff. Maybe a there is a periodic find, but that probably isn't the norm. So, maybe you are right. Maybe.

And now, off to church for me! ;)

Maggie said...

I cracked up at your selection number 4. What a claim to fame that Pensacola girl has!! From what I remember of the Edward Cullen guy, I volunteer to be the Pensacola girl he gropes.

Fantastic Forrest said...

May Laura always love herself just a teensy bit more than she loves anyone else. Not so she's selfish, you understand, just to protect her own interests.

Hank is a born leader. He got the two of you following him without even knowing the plan. May he always be a Democrat.

And you? Are one very funny writer. I love reading your writing almost more than my own, and would absolutely do something awesome with you if you proposed it. If you were ever HOME when I'm traveling through that is!

Meanwhile, here's a goodie for you to ponder related to Laura's teacher's lingual misstep (which would make a great name for a band):

A Lawyer Mom's Musings said...

Okay, Becky. True confession: I hadn't laughed out loud since I saw "Foul Play" about 100 years ago, until this POST.

In the backseat, Laura mused, "I wonder if I will ever love anyone as much as I love myself?" Tee hee tee hee.

And Hank! I want to do something really awesome! Tell me what! Tell me now!

So, re E Cullen, did you see the movie? Is he as "cute" as has been reported?

The Messy Mom said...

On that last note. YES! I totally get it. One time after Iron Man came out and I saw an interview with Robert Downey Jr. I couldn't believe that Sarah Jessica Parker's husband seemed to be such a JERK. He acted like a real loser (sorry for those that love him). It was a total disappoint because I thought he seemed like a nice guy. It hit me days later that it was not Matthew Broderick.

A Day That is Dessert said...

I love both of your kid stories! Especially Laura's.

Casey said...

I am guilty of the celebrity mix up all the damn time. I think it means we're getting old if we can't keep track of those whippersnapers.

Hank's hand raising story was priceless. That's what we're in for next in the stage of kid progression.

I don't have that Polish piece. Should I get it? Probably not since that would force TJ Maxx to get all psyched and restock their shelves. Like the one guy who buys rootbeer and causes the companies to keep making it.

Market at the Square said...

Former Okaloosa County resident here (Niceville, late 70s/early 80s). Just thought I'd represent, though am not so interested in that young man from Twilight.