Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Y'all! I Almost Forgot!

Just got home from my first chemotherapy treatment and it was long but fine and blah blah blah, but guess what?

Today Suburban Matron is two! I started blogging on April 21, 2008. Thus making it the longest-running hobby (or is reading a hobby? or old boyfriends?) that I've ever undertaken, and the most wonderfully satisfying.

Last year, I did a big year retrospective post, navel gazing at my first year of blogging and picking out my favorite post from each month. I totally want to do that but there is this whole boob business, and the wifi was broken at the chemo place, so I didn't get to liveblog it. Maybe I will still pick out my fave posts. I swear I have forgotten some of the stuff I've written. Anything y'all particularly remember?

Anyway, I got home from the doctor's office just now and found a lovely bouquet of flowers from the lovely Michele in my house. Her husband, if you read her blog, is said to be a great horticulturalist and now I have the proof. Gorgeous. You want those two on your team, people.

The treatment took about forty forevers. Yet somehow I only managed to read one In Touch magazine (terrible) and start a Country Living (note: empty frames hung on the wall are not art, or have we discussed this already?), and I chatted with my neighbor and ate half a sandwich that Matt brought me. Nothing hurt and nothing was uncomfortable. I don't feel sick, but I am so full of anti-nausea meds that I could probably win Fear Factor right now.

Also, and maybe you can tell from this post, I started yesterday on this drug called dexamethasone, which I take for three days before and after treatment. It is a steroid and it is designed to tamp down any allergic reactions I might have to the chemo, but mostly if makes me feel totally amazeballs and like Miss Chatty McChatpants. The nurses told me it would do this. They said, "It will give you a lot of energy. A lot." And I was like, "Duh, in the same way that they should make entire airplanes out of that stuff the black recorder box is made of, because that sucker always survives the crash, why don't you give me this wonder drug for the entire course of treatment?" And the nurse blinked and was like, "Are you already on something right now?" Then she said a bunch of stuff about how it is bad to take steroids all the time and Matt chimed in that it would shrink my testicles. So only three days of this miracle pill at the beginning of each cycle.

Last night Mom and Dad got in and they said, "Wow, you do seem peppy." But I'm always pretty talkative, so I didn't believe that the dex had really kicked in. Then, then: My brother Dave had called and said, hey, call me after mom and dad get in and we'll discuss my coming down there while Amy is in town. I was like, okay dude. So later the parents arrive and I'm all, let's call Dave. So we did, and we talked to him for about three minutes. That was all the time we needed to agree, yes, come down next weekend, goodbye.

Then about thirty minutes went by and I thought, "Oh, we need to call Dave to talk about his coming down." So I rang him and it went to voice mail. "Darn," I thought. About ten more minutes went by. I thought, "Hmm, I'll try Dave again because we need to talk about him coming down." This time his phone seemed to be turned off. I thought that was weird since he was expecting my call. I complained to Mom and Dad. They were like, "Um, okay . . . yeah we talked to him not an hour ago. You spoke to him. You. With your voice."

I had totally forgotten that because I had moved down along the river of life since then. And Dave had turned off his phone because it was 11:30 and he actually works for a living.

After that, anytime my hand would stray towards my iPhone, Mom or Dad would say, "Don't call Dave!" So that could be the drugs.

After that, as I chatted everyone into weariness, I said, "Next cycle we are having a party the night before treatment, because we are wasting this. I am killing this room and it is all wasted." They nodded blearily. Are you nodding blearily right about now?

Ooh, so Amy is on her way here from the airport. I will update you on all things, including the talk with Laura I had about my chemo treatment and side effects and hair. That was interesting and another parenting-learning moment for me.

I love you guys and it is not the pharmaceuticals talking!

34 comments:

Steve said...

Let me be the first to say I just about fell out of my chair laughing at this post. Yes, a party sounds like just the thing.

Life on The Rowland Ranch said...

Give that sister of yours a big hug from me. My heart and prayers are with you, Becky. We've never met, but I feel as if we're friends. You're going to make it through this, stronger than ever! Happy Blog Birthday! Reading your blog is one of the highlights of my day.

Michele said...

Will they let you have a Cosmo with that stuff because if you weren't killing the room before you would be then.

Happy Blogiversary!

Lisa Lilienthal said...

You win! Best chemo patient ever!

Viki said...

Well, that's one treatment under your belt. Hang in there.

Jenni said...

This post. This post is my favorite. The one where you said, "amazeballs."

I also really liked the one where you and Matt argued over whether one is supposed to say "sneaked" or "snuck" and you broke the OED out on his ass. Love it. Classic SM.

My word verification is "halla" so halla, girl!

mmeperpetua said...

Why do they only give out the good drugs when bad things happen? They should give you a little gift bag full of those for when you're better and can really enjoy them. And maybe share.

Maggie said...

You are so funny!! I laughed at the thought of building planes out of the black box material. You are so priceless!!! Keep up with the incredible attitude. Love you

Rebekah said...

I love this post too - I read some of it out loud to Sloan, especially Miss Chatty McChatpants. I'm recycling that one some day.

Michele R said...

This is the funniest post ever! Did you even take a breath? I loved your retro post last year. You made us guess your fave post out of the list of 12 or so. Do it again!
Those flowers just popped out a few days ago so gurrlll this is just the beginning!
And about you and your sister bond? Lucky! (tell Amy I am saying that like Napoleon Dynamite would).

Amy said...

Whoo-eee, girl. This is classic stuff.

Ooh, sneaked or snuck was fab. But I have to also vote for the Jane Goodall one about the roving dinner party (that's not the right word, roving, is it?) and the house-under-their-house basements.

And, more recently, "those things are not currency in the place I am" is a line I think I will remember for, oh, the rest of my life, as I go about it wishing I could write like that.

Cassie said...

You're so Dexy. =)

jen said...

whew. don't worry ... i took a breath for you somewhere in there.
i'm thinking a party is definitely in order ...
thinking of you!

Mad Woman said...

I love drugged up posts. Awesome.

Glad Amy will be there soon. Take care you!

anna said...

Umm, yeah, that would be the "meth" part of the dimethisone (or whatever it's called). I'm glad you're feeling OK, was thinkin of you today.

missynall said...

I have got to get into a high school and see if any kids are raiding these out of their parents' medicine cabinets and selling them. Sounds like AMAZING stuff. I was at our Target today and the guy was putting out NEW Liberty of London items!!! I immediately thought of you! I even peeked around to see if I'd run into you again. I guess no Target run on chemo day? Just kidding! ☺ If I had your address I'd totally have dropped some by to cheer you up.

Beth said...

I have to agree, this post ranks up there with the best of them. For sure. My favorite part was the shout out to Fear Factor. Word, girl.

Also, please do not shrink your testicles. That is bad.

Finally, have your party, but save some of the crazy for us. Your pep is NOT wasted on us, Becky. :-)

Marie said...

Better living through chemistry...we always say!

Did you ever see the episode of "Will & Grace" where Jack has a crush on the guy in the coffee shop? He runs into Will's apt. talking at about 200 words per minute. Hilarious and you sound just like him.
Proud of you, Girl! XO

Marie said...

I left out the key point that Jack had spent so much time drinking coffee while he was trying to catch this guy's eye.

The Dental Maven said...

So glad and relieved to hear how you're doing and that you're surrounded by the awesome people that are your family. Loved your post!

Christine said...

I knew I shouldn't have stopped reading you. Forgive me.

I want to just give you a hug for all you're going through...

Stephanie said...

You're a hoot! That stuff sounds like RedBull x 10. I'm saying that because I also didn't breath while reading it.

Bren said...

I'm organizing a 5K to get the wifi in that chemo place fixed.

Jane said...

Happy blog birthday!

Mrsbear said...

Now, I just started coming by, but I swear in my head you sounded just like the little fast talking squirrel from "Hoodwinked". If you've never seen it, nevermind. Glad you're feeling "amazeballs".

Congrats on the bloggiversary.

Keely said...

omg, I need some of that stuff too! I want to feel amazeballs!

(hahhahahah!)

I'm going to go back and pick some of my favorite posts of yours. To help you out, but also because I have the memory of a gnat and it'll be like reading your awesomness for the first time all over again. Happy blogoversary!

aimeewrites said...

Happy Blogiversary!! My 2-year was last week (week before?). I totally forgot about it.

Congrats on conquering the first round of chemo.

I totally agree with Michele on Cosmo+amazeballs meds. FUN.

Casey said...

Happy blogiversary, you toddler you! I'm so glad the treatment went well and you weren't yacking all day. Ugh. Those meds do sound incredible. Let's get some on the black market and we'll all take them at BlogHer. M'kay?

gretchen said...

Happy Anniversary!! You should have a giveaway! What about those schmea schmowels from Australia that you keep talking about? I couldn't possibly choose a favorite post. I enjoy them all. But certainly a pie chart should be included. I have to admit that I think of your pie charts all the time. I tried to explain them to Jimmy once when I was telling him that I've calculated that I spend 47% of my time straightening the sofa and coffee table, but he just stared blankly at me.

Save some of those drugs. You could probably get something good for them if I ever start my Prescription Drug Swap Saturdays blog carnival.

xo

A Lawyer Mom's Musings said...

I'd heard of sexting and drunk dialing. But dex dialing? That's a new one.

You're still funny as hell and we love you ever so much, sweet pea.

OXOXO

Crystal Keilers said...

I will definitely be praying for you : ). And I'm SO glad that Amy is there with you, SO glad! (I told her you'll really need help with all of that Target shopping you do ;).

A Day That is Dessert said...

I'm glad you've got a brother that you want to call repeatedly under duress...and glad the chemo went so well. I'm thinking about you Becky. xoxo

The Stiletto Mom said...

Seriously, you need to do some vlogging next time you take those amazeball drugs...you are hilarious!

Sara said...

Before you even explained that you were on drugs I thought 'Boy, she's pretty juicy in this post!'
Then it was even funnier when I realized you're all hopped up. That stuff sounds awesome!
Only you could make a chemo post this perfectly lol funny.
love!