My mother-in-law Betty and I went to Ikea today. She is visiting for a couple of days, and we were drinking coffee in my sunroom this morning when she espied a little footed bowl in an issue of Country Living. We had just gotten Hank off to school, so we agreed we should go down there in search of this footed bowl that would probably solve all our problems and make us better people. The desert would bloom if we only had this footed bowl.
So we rolled down there. Then we each had the meatball plate. Then I tweeted that we were at Ikea because I am all about the examined life. @SuburbanHaiku responded with her usual pith:
Ikea field trip
Overwhelmed! I always choke.
I'll just have meatballs.
Yes, exactly. But Betty and I ate our meatballs. I was feeling good. I was feeling the pleasure known only by a woman in the middle of the morning while her children are in school, miles away. A woman wearing tall wooden clogs and comfortable jeans. I was ready to put the hurt on some Ikea. But then I got serious. "Listen," I said. "No matter what I say to you later, no matter what you hear, don't let me buy pillows or textiles. No matter how I beg. I need you to be firm." Betty promised to throw her body between me and the Annamoa fabric-by-the-yard. I still haven't done anything with the two yards I bought the last time, the time my sister threatened to punch a guy.
In the end I kept myself pretty well in hand. There was one close moment, down in the downstairs section where they have all the dishes. That's where I can sometimes just lose my shit. I don't need a thing in there, but when faced with decorative trays in graphic patterns or whimsical highball glasses, I kind of black out and start buying presents for people I don't even like. I'm highly aware that this is a trouble spot. So I confined myself to taking a picture.
See? Nothing I couldn't resist, even if they did have the most adorable tablecloths and dishes to match that blue floral pattern. I just remembered my mantra: I already have nice things. I already have nice things. I already have nice things?
In the end, I kept myself in hand. I bought:
roll of easel paper
taper candles in celery green
doormat to replace the one the dog barfed on
a small sheepskin
I know, BORING. But I already have nice things. I already have nice things.
Betty bought tab-top curtains, a small sheepskin, scissors, and casual silverware. She said, "I'm tired of polishing my silver all the time." I was just impressed that she polishes her silver. I never do that because I am slatternly. I tell myself it's a beautiful patina.
We couldn't find that footed bowl anywhere. And we didn't even get any cinnamon rolls. I already have nice calories. I already have nice calories.
Then we headed back north. I like to just pop in to Ikea from time to time and see what is going on in there. It was a nice morning for us.
Do you have a shopping mantra? If so, tell me what it is and I'll put it in my rotation. xoxo-B