I'm Huge in Poland, and Other Updates

Now with photographic illustration!

1) Remember the other day when I posted my little infographic about Jon Bon Jovi? Well, after I put that up, the traffic on this blog more than doubled overnight. Gracious! I was like, "When did I get to be such a big deal?" So I delved deeper into my newfound popularity. Turns out that my little chart had been linked to by five different Jon Bon Jovi fan forums. Also, turns out that there are at least five different Jon Bon Jovi fan forums. Three in English, one in Spanish, and one in Polish. They're loggin' in from Lodz. ("Lodz" is pronounced "woodge." How I know that is a boring story. But go ahead and purse your lips and say, "woodge." Doesn't that feel nice?) So I don't read Polish, but based on their emoticons, they liked the chart. Unless there's some weird opposite thing with emoticons in Polish culture, the way a thumbs-up means "screw you" in some countries? I think my Polish 15 minutes is coming to an end now anyway. I seem to be back to regular popularity levels. Do widzenia, y'all.

2) I finally turned on the air conditioner in my house. I blasted through my June 1 goal, and even made it to June 2, for dignity's sake. (You don't do the thing the very minute you're allowed to do the thing, right?) Okay actually it wasn't even really warmish in the house until the very end of May, and I could have toughed it out a little longer, but last night, Hank woke up around midnight in his bed and called out for me. This is unusual. When I went to him he was crying. I said, "Why are you crying?" and he said, "I'm sad." Then he wept softly. Once I'd eliminated all the possible sources of toddler-sadness, I decided that he was really trying to say, "I'm hot." So down slammed the windows and on came the air. He went right back to sleep.

3) Another reason to air-condition, besides how good--so good--it feels on my body, is that Laura has gotten fitted with orthodontic headgear that she has to sleep in. The headgear is to head off the crazy monkey prognathism that she inherited from my family on my mother's side. Hi Mom! She is being a total trouper about it, and I didn't want to compound the discomfort of the headgear with a warm bedroom. Her only complaint is that she can't sleep on her stomach. She said, "But Mom, I'm made to sleep on my face!"

4) I started Weight Watchers last weekend. My sister and I were starting to joke about starting a girl band called The Muffin Tops. And unlike Amy, I'm not pregnant. So I signed up for the online program, because their website seems really good, and they have an iPhone app for tracking food points. I like that there really aren't any forbidden foods--that you just track what you eat. So far it has definitely kept me from random, incidental eating, like finishing those leftover sandwich crusts. Like, I'm not spending two points on those soggy child-leavings, two points buys me a shot of vodka. So far I've lost two pounds. I'm practically disappearing here.

5) I went back and got my eyebrows and my hair done this evening. That took almost 4 hours.



One takeaway: I had forgotten this, but the eyebrow shaping hurts more than the bikini wax. I think because it goes on longer, and it happens on your face. Then it was time to get coiffed. The hair lady went crazy, in a good way. She put lowlights and two different colors of highlights in my hair. Kind of like Neopolitan ice cream, only blonde. And natural. Because that's me--so, so into being natural. The cut is good, I think, and she fluffed and styled me to a fare-thee-well. So yeah, there's another reason to air-condition the house: my increased HOTNESS. Wha-chow!

I crack myself up.

I feel like there were other matters I wanted to share with you, but they escape me. My life seems to be made up of things that are too insignificant to mention by themselves. I guess this is the stuff of life. Anything exciting with y'all?