I Can Has Naps?

Today's itinerary was not especially hectic. But somehow I was barely up to the challenge of normal life. Matt is still in California, so it was just me and the kids. Because I love daily itinerary posts. . .

I woke up at 8:30. Today was my day to drive the carpool up to swim team practice. I rousted both kids out of bed and I was driving to pick up our neighbors by 8:55, a cup of yesterday's reheated coffee on board. While the girls swam from 9 to 10 at the pool, I pushed Hank on the swing. Science has yet to determine the maximum amount of time that Hank would want to be pushed. In computer models of the scenario, either the sun burns out or the universe collapses back into a singularity before he wants to get off and go slide. So that was my cardio for the day.

At 10:00, we dropped our friends off and came back home to a round of cheerios. I dragged the garbage and the recycling to the curb. Then things are hazy. I think there was a lot of playing with trains. I was allowed to touch some of the trains, even. I nurtured Hank's burgeoning imagination by pretending to be tied to the train tracks. Then I did a few loads of laundry, neatly dumping the clean clothes in a giant pile in a chair. Oh, why there they are right now.

Around noon I called AT&T to see about options for using my iPhone in Australia. I don't even know that I can't just get by with a temporary Australian phone and my sister's internet connection. But my iPhone is my precious, and I don't want it to think I didn't even try to keep us together. So they signed me up for some kind of AT&T World Explore & Swashbuckle plan for six dollars a month that gives me the privilege of paying $1.29 PER MINUTE for voice calls Down Under. Seriously. I don't think I'll be talking much. Also I signed on for the AT&T Sun Never Sets on Our Empire Plan for data, costing $25. I feel like I just got worked. They are probably sending me a fruit basket right now.

Then I arranged online to have our mail held while we're away. The USPS website is awesome. You can do anything on there. Anything. Go try it.

Then I noticed that Design Mom had a post about having arranged her bookshelves by color. I have been wanting to do this for the longest. Go look at it. But I need someone to come over and help me do it. Takers?

Then after lunch Frenemy Neighbor texted me and said, "Would Laura like P to come over and play at this time?" And I texted back, "Sure." And she answered, "Thank you. I can work in peace now." Great! Me, not so much. I was feeling bad, because the day after my last post about Frenemy, in which I gave vent to my frustrations with her, she got stung on the hand by a fire ant, and she's seriously allergic to them, and had to go get a shot and spend two days in bed. She showed up at my house with a puffy Frankenhand. So I'm not sure if this blog has the power to call down the wrath of nature on people, but it was not my intent.

I put Hank down for a nap. I didn't go to sleep in his room, though I really really wanted to. I did some work, a very little. Laura and P straightened up my bedroom for me. They like to do this, and it is adorable, except they hide the dirty clothes I've left on the bathroom floor somewhere in my closet.

At 3:30 I woke Hank up and we took Laura to her orthodontist appointment. The office manager wanted to chat with me the entire time Laura was with the doc, instead of letting me read Us Weekly. Sad trombone. There may be some detail of the Jon & Kate sitch that I missed, people. So the dentist is happy with how Laura's headgear is working, and gave us some extra rubber bands to take on our trip. I said, "Oh, you can't buy these at the store?" And he laughed, like, "Oh NO, you can't just buy those rubber bands." Because these are special or something.

It was nearly five o'clock, and I had no intentions of cooking supper. Then I remembered that Tuesday night is Kids Eat Free night at Chick-fil-a. I've written a paean to them before, those God-lovin' chicken cookers. (Amy's phrase.) I figure the play place would be a good way for Hank to get his ya-yas out a little. So we roll up to the Chick, and lo and behold, it is Cinderella night. There is a young woman in full Cinderella drag, smiling and hugging on the kids. Her wig made her look only slightly tranny. The excitement level in that place went to 11. Probably 20 little girls were there in their princess costumes. Laura was really into looking at Cinderella, but with an expression of bemused tolerance, like she was so far beyond all this princess nonsense. Hilarious.

Have I mentioned that at every moment of the day, it was 149 degrees? It was.

Perhaps that's why, when we got home, I was felled like a tree. I lay down on the couch and dozed while Hank watched the entirety of Night at The Museum. Yes. Please don't forget to nominate me for Mother of the Year, if you haven't already. You see, I had been up late the night before because I got sucked into that "How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria" show on BBC America. It's like American Idol, only Andrew Lloyd Webber is picking the star of his production of Sound of Music, to play in the West End. It is what TV's are for, y'all. Look into it.

Then I got vertical, and there was more nurturing of children and some light housekeeping. Then when it was almost bedtime, Frenemy Neighbor called and asked if Laura wanted to go up to the pool for one last dip with them. That's what summer is all about, after all. So I hustled her out the door, and Hank into bed. And here I sit, refraining from eating all the leftover birthday cake.

Are y'all getting into your summer routines? Oh, and in my day there was lots of thinking, and thoughts, and a rich inner life. Don't know if that came across, the rich inner life part.

I'm humbly submitting this to Keely's Random Tuesday Thoughts.