Met A Buncha New Moms

A mother of a little boy in Hank's preschool class called me out of the blue one afternoon this week, and said that she was putting together a last-minute birthday part for her son, to be held the very next day at one of those bounce house places. And even though she was having the party at 10 am, I thought this was a swell idea.

What piqued my interest about this woman is that she showed a real inclination to talk my ear off, right there in the first conversation we'd ever had. She was more than outgoing, she was actually bubbling. Her true reason, she said, for wanting to have this party was to meet the other kids' moms. She said that the after school pick-up scene, where everyone mills around waiting for the door into the classrooms to be opened, makes her feel like she's in high school with nobody to talk to. I like it when people are really deliberate about their social needs, you know? So I pulled a little something out of the gift stash, and to the party we went.

At ten o'clock on a weekday, the bounce place was blessedly deserted. We were the only people in the place, which meant we could let the kids run loose without our trailing them every minute. We sat in the middle of the room and had a good time chatting. I had met a few of these women at open house, but we didn't really remember each other's names. Bubbly Mom was talking a mile a minute to everyone, and she repeated her bit about how school pick-up makes her feel all high school awkward. Everyone laughed, as though in recognition, and I did too, even though I realized in that moment that I don't really feel that way at all. When I approach a group of people I don't know, especially other moms, I feel just fine. Age has its privileges, I guess. I wondered if she really meant what she was saying? Or if this is just something women say. I have heard it before. I wonder if it's how we bond? The way that teenage girls initiate social bonds by complaining. Anyhoo.

I asked everyone if they were bothered by the fact that, in preschool, our kids have specific spots on the carpet that they are supposed to sit on at certain times of the day, like circle time, or if I am some kind of crunchy California anarchist on this subject. Bubbly Mom said, "Yeah, it's just part of the culture here, the way we're all supposed to have our toes done and play tennis." It's funny 'cause it's true.

So another notable moment was when one woman arrived and spoke to another mom, who was there with her three year-old and two younger toddlers. The newcomer said, "So you have twins?" (Which made me wince, remembering when I'd last asked that question.) But she said yes, and pointed out her two one year-olds. The other mom said, "But you're so skinny!" I thought that was weird, but the mom of twins said, "I never get to sit down," which was fine, but it just reminded me of Ms. Manner's dictum to Never Make a Specific Comment on Another Person's Appearance, Even To Say Something Positive. Because it makes people uncomfortable, and you never know what their private circumstances are. You can say, "You look terrific." And that is all. I am getting all prescriptive up in here today! It could be the rain.

Then Bubbly Mom was asking me to recommend books for her very-precocious eleven year-old, who she says has read the Bible cover-to-cover three times. (I reported that to Matt, and he said, "No she hasn't, not really." Hmm.) So I suggested those Philip Pullman books, The Golden Compass et al. Bubbly Mom said that her daughter had read the entire Twilight series in a week. A silent "NOOOOOOOOooooooo!" formed in my throat. I said, "She read all four?" And she said yes. Holy, wholly inappropriate, Batman!

If you would like to read a hilarious and spoiler-filled explication of what was so disturbing about that, read this review. It articulates why I think those books are bad for young girls way better than I've managed to do in the past.

Then again, nobody exercised much control over my reading when I was a kid. So I read a lot of Stephen King, which was scary and had dirty parts, but as an adult I think I can say that it was 100 times better than the Twilight stuff.

I didn't mean for this to become a Twilight post. It's probably the rain.

Bubbly Mom has already called me again to invite Hank and me to go with a few other people to see the Wiggles live. Should be fun even though Greg is no longer with the band.

I hope y'all are having a nice weekend. Last night we made hamburgers and had our buds over for some Beatles Rock Band. In Kelly, I've found a friend who likes to sing as loud as I do. We were deafening. Deafeningly awesome.