I Are Room Mom Now: Part Deux

Last week I posted about the startling news that I am the Room Mom for Laura's second grade class. I was a little trepidatious, not because of the official duties, but because I knew there were "unofficial" or secret duties, like collecting money for teacher gifts, that I wasn't sure how to go about. Also, my two year-old creates some drag on my in-room volunteering. (I know I was not alone in my need to be clued in, because that post got a lot of traffic from folks googling "room mom duties.") You guys advised me to delegate and be very clear about what I could and couldn't do. I emailed Jan, the other mom who had said she wanted to help with crafts. I asked her to be Co-Room Mom (everyone loves a title), and suggested we divide up the work. She agreed. And there was a meeting of all Room Moms up at school yesterday. So here's what I learned and here's what I'm doing.

In our school, the Room Moms do these things:

• Write to all the parents once or twice a year and solicit donations that will be used to pay for two class parties, teacher gifts, and special treats and activities during Teacher Appreciation Week.
• Keep a ledger of all money received and spent, and give the ledger to the principal in May.
• Create and maintain the schedule of weekly classroom volunteers, send out reminders to parents.
• Oversee the planning of the two classroom parties.
• Solicit donated stuff from parents for an auction basket, as a PTA fundraiser in December.
• Coordinate with the parents of each month's birthday kids about the in-class celebration.
• Be in charge of doing a monthly craft project with the class (our class only--I don't think other rooms are doing this).

Donations: A big part of the Room Mom meeting was spent talking about collecting money to fund class activities. I was glad that it was the big focus, because this is the part I was most in the dark about. In the next week, I am going to send out an email, and send a letter with each kid, introducing myself and Jan, listing what events we have planned, and asking for a voluntary contribution of cash. They'll make the checks out to me, and I'll keep track of the kitty. Our guidelines say that each family can contribute no more than $50 for the year to the Room Mom fund. (Any more than that needs to go to the teacher for her craft fund, or to the PTA. Some Room Moms are going to solicit money twice this year, with a max of $25 each time, but we have the option of doing it just once for the whole year, and I would rather go that route.

I think this part requires some tact, because I know there are families with multiple kids in school who just can't write another check for this. Plus, times are hard out there. There are plenty of non-monetary things the class needs, though, and the letter will talk about those too. The money that goes in and out needs to be kept track of; the principal told us that she gets calls at the end of the year from parents who want to know what the class spent their money on, and she likes to be able to give them an exact accounting. Our Room Mom last year sent this ledger out to all of the parents, at least a couple of times.

The No-Cash Option: One woman raised her hand and said that her child's teacher had decreed that she didn't want money collected at all--that parents were to donate food and material things but no cash. That would definitely be one way to go. Then kids could bring individual gifts if they wanted, but there would be no class gift. It's good to clarify with the teacher which way she prefers. As I write this, this way is making more sense to me. My class is not like this, though.

Parties and Auction Basket: At Open House, Mrs. S had parents sign under the event they wanted to help with, then she gave those lists to me. In the next couple of days, I will email each group of parents to confirm that they're willing and able to work on that activity, and I'll ask one of them to designate herself as the head of that event. There were tons of moms for each party and only one person for the auction basket. Guess she gets to be in charge of that.

In-class Volunteers: Mrs. S also gave each parent a list of weekly volunteer needs, so they could check off which they were willing to do. Jan, my Co-Room Mom, is going to be in charge of the weekly volunteer scheduling. This was the part of the job that I was most dreading, because 1) it just sounds dreadful to me, and 2) I can't go and fill in on short notice, if someone cancels, because of the toddler situation. My impression of our Room Mom last year was that she did a lot of in-class stuff herself. I am not able to do that. I gave Jan the parent volunteer interest forms and she's going to start scheduling.

Monthly Crafts: Jan is really into this. Mrs. S wants them to be seasonally appropriate but "not too complicated." I didn't hear any other Room Moms mention crafts.

Monthly Birthday Celebrations: I know all the kids' birthdays, as do their own mothers, presumably. And I know the dates every month that Mrs. S wants to have cake. So all I have to do is email a couple of moms a month and tell them when to bring cake. I don't remember ever, ever having an in-class observation of my birthday. I think this might be new.

Teacher Gifts: At the meeting they supplied us with a little "Teacher Wishlist" form with spaces for the teacher to put her favorite foods, interests, and favorite stores (Ann Taylor Loft. All teachers love Ann Taylor Loft. And Target.) There were other little bits of info, like favorite color and favorite takeout lunch. Even if you don't have a handy form given to you, it would be good to get this info somehow. I was going to email another teacher I know who is a friend of Mrs. S. The thing around here is to give a big gift card from the class at the Christmas and end of the year parties.

So what to do right now? We're in the start-up phase of the school year, and if you are a Room Mom, and there's no big meeting organized for you guys, this is a good time to meet with the teacher and find out:

• What her expectations are--some teachers do a lot of this stuff themselves, or some may want lots of computer help or other kinds of involvement from parents.
• Get the other parents' contact info from her--you will need it to make a class directory and get the ball rolling on donations and volunteering. (At our school you have to have permission to include someone's info in a contact list, and Mrs. S already had them indicate whether they wanted to be included or not, so be sure to respect people's preference.)
• What kind of gifts she likes, if you're going that route.

Then find someone to help you, whether it's someone who signed up for a lot of things, or another parent you already know. There really are not a lot of great Room Mom resources on the web. There is this place, but it kind of talks to you as though you're new to our planet. It has some sample forms, though, like a Teacher Info/Wishlist thing. Maybe more good stuff if you dig. What I really like, actually, is Family Fun Magazine. I just started getting this, and unlike some family mags (I'm looking at you, Cookie) it's filled with things that don't actually cost money. Their website has tons of cute and doable crafts, like these guys:

Presh. Okay, maybe only I like those. But I hope this helps give you an idea of what's involved in Room Momming, and also that you don't have to enslave yourself. So much depends upon the teacher, not just on her wishes but on her degree of organization and how on-the-ball she was at the outset in getting volunteer commitments from parents. I hope you have a coalition of the willing to draw upon. And I would love to hear how it works where you are, and what you guys have planned. Here's to a good year, y'all!