Tuesday, November 30, 2010

A New-to-Me Rug

Hank, November 30

We were at my revered mother-in-law's house for Thanksgiving. It had been a while since I'd been there. I admired one of her rugs and said, "If you ever get tired of this, I'll take it off your hands." She is like me in the sense that her feelings for a household object can turn on a dime.  She said, "You can have it, I am trying to get rid of some things, and it is more you than me. I think it is too Native-American for me." It's a kilim from Turkey. But I knew what she meant.  She is more the Aubusson type.

So we brought it home and I am loving it in that spot.  I like the dark rug in the light-colored sun room, and it helps ground my couch, now in its winter plumage.  Do you find that you want to change up your décor from season to season?  I like having a bare floor in the summer, but it's a nice change for fall to have something lying there besides the dog.

And somehow in my system of decorating beliefs, the kilim rug and the tartan blankets totally go together.

Here's another pic that shows the rug better.

New-to-Me Rug

Speaking of things from far-off places, my parents are returning from Australia tomorrow.  They've been gone for a month, down there visiting my sister, who continues to live 8,000 miles away from me in selfish pursuit of her own life.  Amy, don't you know I need you to come over here and look at my rug?

I am glad that Mom and Dad will be back on this side of the world.  We are used to seeing them every couple of weeks, either here or up in the mountains.  I know they are sad to leave the other grandchildren, but I have two here who are very fetching.

The only downside of their return is that we'll have to give them their iPad back.  That's what Hank is so engrossed in above.  It was nice of them to leave it in our care.  iPad, you will be missed.  And Dad, I owe you $18.97 for the iTunes purchase of Plants vs. Zombies, Smallworld, and an episode of "The Real Housewives of Atlanta."  Sorry about that last one but we canceled our cable and I had to find out what the deal was with Phaedra's baby because there was no way that chick didn't know how far along her pregnancy was.  Please.

Anyway, rugs, iPads, hurray for generous grandparents!

It is raining here with the raining.  It rains therefore I blogs.  Please enjoy your day.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Who You Gonna Call?

Ghostbuster

While we were in Chattanooga at Matt's mom's for Thanksgiving, we got a bunch of things down from the attic and unearthed this decades-old Ghostbusters outfit. Matt's grandmother made it for his younger brother Andy.  It came complete with proton pack and ghost trapper thing.  It was like a little Christmas for Hank. He wore the coveralls for two days and ate Thanksgiving dinner in them.

In among the attic stuff were some baby clothes of Laura's that I had given Betty to store when we lived in a tiny apartment.  Two big bins of things that just seemed too good to get rid of at the time.  I sat down to sort through them, and oh, the memories they brought back.  I kept very few things in the end: the little smocked corduroy dress she wore on her first birthday, her first bathing suit, a soft little jacket, and maybe a couple more dresses.

There were no bad memories associated with any of it, so I don't know why it should have made me so sad, those old clothes.  It made me feel that those times are gone and they won't be back.  It isn't like I want another baby, or not really, I just want those babies again.

Back in the summer when my friend Erika was visiting, I gave her a pair of Hank's outgrown sandals to put on her toddler.  Then I forgot I had done it.  The other week she texted me a picture of her little boy's feet in the sandals, and the message said, "Your heart goes on."  I laughed because it was true. I think I must have said something like, "If you can use these, my heart will go on," and she knew what I meant.  Isn't that what we're feeling when we give away a child's hand-me-downs?  If you can see another baby wearing your baby's old clothes, then somehow that past isn't as past.

Here are a few more goofy pics from our Thanksgiving Day.  At dinner I spoke to Hank and Laura and asked them if they would consider staying 4 and 9.  Hank was willing, but Laura said no.  So unobliging.

Laura Setting Table

Laura with Turkey Leg

Hank with Green Bean

Hank

Hank was busy cutting his roll with his butter knife, and he asked, "When you cut something with a knife, does the sharpness stay in the food?"  I thought that was such a strange question.  It is kind of blowing my mind.  I might not have captured exactly how he worded it, but we knew what he meant.  We reassured him that it was safe to eat his bread.

I hope you all had a nice holiday, if you had one.  Other non-US Anglophone friends, I hope you had a nice Thursday!  xoxo-B

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Holiday Travel and Intergenerational Cultures of Grooming

As many of us set out to visit family this holiday season, I offer this:

You know how when you go visit your grandparents, there are cleansers, lotions, and grooming products in their bathroom that you have never heard of, known of, or seen for sale in any retail establishment?  You get in the shower, get wet, and find yourself confronting a completely foreign array of cleansers, lotions, and unguents?

Matt and I have a name for those products.

Grampoo.

As in, "Honey, your hair looks kind of, um, different."

"Yes, I had to use the grampoo."

So as you hit the road, don't forget to bring your own toiletries.

But don't worry about bringing a box of Kleenex because the bathroom closet at your grandparents' is stuffed with them.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Date Night, Sporty Spice Edition

Matt's mom came and took our kids away. They are out of school all week, so she whisked them up to Chattanooga this morning to be with her for a few days. Matt and I will head up there on Wednesday, but for now, we are childless.

My house is giant. And quiet.

It seems limitless, the things you can do when you don't have kids at home. I could nap. Think deeply. Think shallowly. Watch the leaves fall while eating toast. Have some part of my body professionally groomed. Assemble a vacuum cleaner.

So far today I've accomplished three of those.

But the possibilities are all enticing, no?

And tonight, yay! Matt and I are going downtown to see the Hawks-Celtics game. Matt is a big Celtics fan, though he doesn't often get to see a live game. He was reluctant to spend money on decent seats, but I knew how much he would enjoy it, and he basically never buys himself anything, so I pitched a fit until he agreed to go. And I get to go too.  I think it will be fun and a different thing from any other date night we've had.

I have rarely been to a professional sporting event, but I am ready to enliven it for everyone with my color commentary.

Kidding! So I don't know much about the baskets-ball, but I have new boots to wear and I like to go places at night.

Date night!

I hope you are having a nice pre-holiday Monday.

You have my love,
B

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Just A Pilgrim, Partially Obscured

Pilgrim Partly Hidden by Pole

Sometimes, we feel we deserve the starring role but others just don't seem to agree.  They see us as more of a line filler, hand clapper, turkey trot corps member type.  Oh well, there is still dignity in doing our little part.

The preschool Thanksgiving feast was Thursday, and the four year-olds sang five (!) songs. This was the best picture I could get of Hank in action, without stepping on a lot of Tory Burch flats.

Then Laura came home from school and said that the roles had been assigned for the big fourth-grade Lewis and Clark musical they put on in January.  She was hoping for a big speaking role, or a part with a singing solo.  She does have a lovely singing voice and Lord knows she doesn't mind attention.

So the parts got passed around, and the music teacher asked her to be Sacajawea's understudy.  She was disappointed, because although she wasn't entirely sure what an understudy is, she got that it wasn't like getting the part of Sacajawea.  I said, "Come on, don't you think Sacajawea is the most important part, and that the teacher asking you to the be the understudy means she thinks you're one of the best in the whole group?  She could see that.  And she is looking forward to having to learn Sacajawea's part.

In a show that is performed exactly one time, though, I'm not sure that the understudy has a great chance of getting on.  But as a another mom pointed out to me, it will be cold and flu season.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

We Finally Canceled Our Cable

We have sometimes intended to shut off our TV service over the last few years but it has never quite happened.  In fact, the last time I meant to cancel our cable, I just switched from Comcast to U-Verse and added more channels.  Wha?

So what made me finally cut the cord?  I think several things came together.  We have Netflix instant streaming through our xbox, and the kids get most of the TV entertainment they have from there (or all of it, in Hank's case).  Netflix keeps adding more and more stuff that's streamable.  We never get actual discs in the mail anymore.  

Actually, sometimes I've felt that having easy access to cable and network TV has kept me from watching better things on Netflix.  Like, after the kids go to bed, I'll mindlessly watch an episode of "House Hunters" instead of mindlessly watching "Damages" on Netflix, which is way better.  

Somehow, my having finished my Ph.D. also made me want to ditch the cable.  It seems like I should be ready to watch more TV without guilt, but it's happened that there are now so many more things I want to read for pleasure, and TV is getting in the way of that.  

And, finally, we played with an xbox Kinect the other night, and I said to Matt, "I want one of these."  He was like, "Ugh, it's all too much with the stuff."  I said, "How about if we cancel the cable? And he was like, "Deal."  I made the mistake of letting that slip to Laura, so everyday since then, she's asked me, "Did we cancel the cable yet?"  The girl wants a Kinect.  

Matt was into the plan because he always loves to save a dollar, and he watches literally no TV besides the Celtics.  

The only sad part of losing the cable and the shows we'd recorded with our DVR is that now I need a way to preserve my "FRINGE" fame.  Did y'all know I was this famous?  Last week my name was written into the screenplay.  See here!  The writers of that episode, "6955kHz," are two friends of ours from college, and they gave us a heads-up to look for a surprise in that episode.  I thought it might be like, my name is given to one of the characters, but it's never spoken and would only appear in the credits.  But no!  Lance Reddick (who, to me, will always be Mr. Abadon in "Lost," said my full name, and then all the characters were like, Becky this and Woomer that.  It was such a trip, I was giggling for two days.  

I thought the actress who played me really got to the emotional core of my character.  That part where the short wave radio transmission gives her amnesia and she pulls a knife on her husband? OMG, that's exactly what I would have done!  And my TV husband Laird Woomer (our friend Glen said it was going to be "Matthew" but they'd had a Matt he week before) was a total hunk and obviously deeply in love with Becky.  Fame! So I had it saved on my DVR to show my parents when they get back from Australia, but now I'll have to find it online somewhere.  

Fame!

So that's what's going on here.  Have you guys cut the cords on your TV already?  I mentioned it on facebook and everybody was like, "OMG, you are so two thousand late, none of us has watched TV on an actual TV since Howdy Doody."  But I never claimed to be a digital pioneer.  

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

The Crying Part of The Day

Warning, someone cries in this post but it is not a child.

Like I told y'all, Hank was sort of sickish on Thursday, then Friday morning he rallied, and then Friday afternoon he got warmer and droopy-eyed, and he said his ear hurt again. I scooped him up and drove right up the road to the CVS Minute Clinic. I had never thought to go there before, but a couple of people said it was a good quick alternative.  And at 4:00 on a Friday afternoon, I didn't think the pediatrician was a feasible thing.

Let's put it mildly and say that Hank did not want to go to the doctor.  He kept saying, so earnestly, "Look, I'm all better!"  So I spent a lot of parent trust capital on telling him, this will not take too long and nothing bad will happen.  By the time we got to the CVS, he was resigned.  We checked in at the little computer and we were sixth in line. Whoa, where did all these people come from?  But I didn't know how quickly it might move, and we sat down to wait.

Hank played Angry Birds on my iPhone for a while.  As we sat there, I could tell his fever was going up.  He said, "Mom, I'm one hundred percent fine!"  I gave him a drink.  He grew more sluggish.  Then he sat in my lap.  Then he fell asleep.  The nurse practitioner would call each person in and give apologetic smiles to everyone waiting.

We waited an hour and ten minutes.  It didn't even seem that long, to me.  You know how, sometimes when you're doing something for your kid or waiting for something your kid needs, the passing of time barely registers?  I just sat there in the chair, leaned against the glass-doored cooler, and held him.

Finally they called us in.  I woke him up to walk into the room, where he immediately climbed up on the vinyl bench and lay down.  The nurse's assistant took his temperature, and it was 103.  She glanced at the nurse and took it again.  103.  The nurse said, "Oh, when their fever is 103 or higher, it's an automatic refer-out. We can't treat him."

I just looked at her, like I didn't understand what she was saying.  Because I didn't.  She actually reached up and took a binder off of a shelf, and looked up the relevant policy.  "Yes, I'm sorry, it's 103.  You have to take him to urgent care."

I said, "You can't even look in his ear?"  I was kind of in shock.  They were apologetic.  I said, "How long is urgent care going to take?"  That sounds like I was irritated, but it was an honest question, I was totally confused and tired.  There was some hemming/hawing.  The nurse phoned the urgent care down the street and reported that they had only two people waiting.

I said, "Okay Hank, we are going to have to go to one more doctor."  And he pleaded, "Oh mom, can we go home for just a little bit first?"  And I started to cry.

It surprised me, and it certainly surprised the other two women.  I have been in a lot of doctor's offices this year, and I've gotten some bad news at different times, but I never cried in someone's office, not one time. Not the first time.  Until I was in the dumb CVS with the feverish and miserable Hank.  I just felt like he had been so patient and trusting, and what I had told him about making one stop had been a lie.  I hated it.  I would indeed have taken him home, except by then I was actually worried about him.

I said, "I could have dosed him up with Tylenol when we checked in here an hour ago, and then his fever wouldn't have been 103 right now." And they acknowledged that this was the case.

There's one lesson learned.  I understand why they have that policy, but I think that they might post it somewhere in the waiting area so that people do not wait over an hour with a sick child who then cannot be diagnosed or treated.  They then gave me a $5/15 coupon.

So I took Hank by the hand and we left the office.  I'm sure the people in the waiting area looked at my face and wondered what terrible event had just befallen us.  I walked straight to the shelf and got some acetaminophen and made Hank eat it, then I paid for it and some Gatorade at the back counter.  The always-odd pharmacy clerk who rang me up pointed out to me that she had swiped a CVS card and saved me $1.99.  I thanked her and told her I didn't know where my CVS card was.  She said, "Yes, if I hadn't done that it would have cost you $1.99 more."  Then I killed her, killed her dead with a terrible glare from my terrible eyes and I left the whole store a smoldering ruin.

In the car, I got busy soothing Hank and explaining how we had to just go see one more doctor, one more place and they would give him medicine to make him feel better.  Yes, honey, I know you feel fine but I don't think you really are fine. (He did not feel fine.)  He said, "Mom, why were you crying?  Would you please stop crying?"  I told him that I had felt frustrated but that everything was totally okay and that I was sorry that it scared him. He said, "That's okay, Mom."

So we get to the urgent care place and we get back into an exam room pretty quickly. The guy who took our history was pretty good and he listened to what I said.  Hank's temp was still 103, but was starting to perk up, even that fast, from the Tylenol.  Then the doctor came in and kind of overreacted to the 103 number.  She retook all of the same history and asked me the same question a couple of times without hearing my answer.  I told her, "Yes, whenever our family gets a cold virus, which most of us have right now, it seems that Hank spikes a fever that lasts about 36 hours."  I was not that worried by the high number--to me the number, especially with a rapid onset like that, is not the worrying sign that I look for.

She looked him over and said, "Both his ears are red."  By then he was active and talking.  She said, "He looks good, but the numbers don't look good."

And here's where the visit changed for me:  She said, "Would he let us draw his blood?"

I didn't like that question or the terms in which it was asked.  Like, well do you need to take his blood?  Because if it is necessary, we will do it.  Is it necessary or not?  Tell me that you need it and I will make it okay.  But by asking that question in that manner, I felt that she was willing to exploit the fact of a child's good-natured compliance with being in the doctor's office, for uncertain necessity.  If Hank had been raising hell the whole time instead of chatting up the medical assistant, that issue would not have been raised in that way, I don't think.  And I didn't think they were equipped to do a blood draw in the painless way they do at the children's hospital.  This unfolded in my head in about half a second.

I said, "Well is there a good reason for you to do it?"  And she said, "Why don't we just treat him for the ears and see how he does?"  I said, "Yes, let's do that."  She went away.

I always have great relationships with doctors, both mine and my kids.  But the scenario had shifted into one where I felt I now had to put myself in between Hank and the staff there, like, to protect him, ironically.  This may have been an overreaction in itself, but I was in a fragile state.  Hank, though, was rapidly becoming more fine.

The doc came back in and said, "They can do a CBC with just a finger stick, can we do that?"  I said okay, and Hank was not thrilled when that happened, not at all, but he recovered once he had a giant band-aid.  His temp was down to 101 and he was watching Clone Wars on the little TV.  We waited some more.

The doctor came back in and said his white count was 13, which isn't that elevated if at all, and would he let them give him a shot of rocephin in the butt?  At the word "shot," Hank began to very clearly say that he does not like shots.  And my face must have told her that I didn't either, and she gave us a prescription for Augmentin and told me to bring him back in the next day if he wasn't better.

By the time we got to Publix to get the prescription filled, three hours after our odyssey began, Hank was way chipper and only I was left feeling slightly bruised by the afternoon's events.  The experience in CVS was a real low point.

Another bit of useful info: Augmentin is not one of the antibiotics that Publix gives out for free, as it is compounded of birds' nests and wizard's tears, and in fact it will cost $61.  But one dose of that and he was put right.  He went on to have a brilliant weekend and we are all getting over the crying portion of the day.  The day started with Laura's lovely curls and ended with a thankfully-more-comfortable Hank, with a lot of living in between.

Surely nobody is still reading this but if you are, thank you, I think I just needed to tell someone all that.

Smacks,
B

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Authentic Eighteenth-Century Curls

Laura as Sybil Ludington
Sure they are!
On Friday morning, Laura's fourth-grade class put on an American Revolution Wax Museum, for which each kid was assigned a character.  They had to research their person, write a short speech about their notable achievements, and then come in costume ready to do their spiel whenever anyone approached them.  Laura was Sybil Ludington, who, as Laura could tell you, is remembered as the female Paul Revere, though, as Laura would also tell you, Sybil's midnight ride was twice as long as Paul's, AND she was only sixteen years old and rode forty miles wearing a skirt.

Kind of awesome, really.

We know a lot about Sybil Ludington in this house right now.

Coming up with colonial costumes, two weeks after Halloween, was, as we say in the South, a total PITA OMG WTF?  Like, by the time anyone could focus her attention on this, Party City and similar retail costume clothiers had turned their businesses into Christmas emporia with not a Betsy Ross lace cap to be found.

That's what I was tense about: the headwear.  Laura had this old dress-up dress that we used as a base, though Laura complained that "the crushed velvet makes me look too rich and I'm supposed to be middle class."  Yes dear, you are entirely too rich.

Then we added the long faux-leather vest, which was actually a "child's pirate vest" we found left over at Party City.  Our concept for Sybil was that she was wearing her ordinary day dress and then, when it became clear that she had to go muster the militia, she threw on some of her father's riding gear and set out that minute.

We added the gloves because it took the look away from the sort of pirate moment we were starting to have.

But I knew the way to clinch "colonial" would be to add a bonnet or one of those Mother Goose lace caps.  I could not find one, and nobody had one to lend.  I tried to improvise something with a tea towel, and we started to venture into Mary and Joseph territory.

So somehow Laura and I came up with the idea that if I curled her hair, it would seem costumey and appropriately eighteenth century.  I mean, all girls in early America had these ringlets, right?  I'm sure there is an American Girl movie that says so.  And anyway, I think it's more authentic than a bonnet because only grown, married ladies covered their heads all the time.  Or so sayeth the BBC adaptation of Pride and Prejudice and that's authority enough for me.  I got up at 6:45 and went to work with the curling iron and the hairspray, and she was SO IN LOVE with herself when I was finished.

Anyway, the whole event was super cute, even if those fourth-graders are Olympic-level mumblers.

And there was a very not-African Phyllis Wheatley there.  Also, Laura's friend Patrick Henry was so cute I wanted to pin him to my jacket.

Patrick Henry

Declaration Gang


Laura's 4th Grade Class

And in other Laura hair news, the cutest barrette arrived in the mail from Beth.

Laura with Barrette

Peace Barrette

Beth has a cute Etsy shop where she sells these handmade felt barrettes.  Thank you, Beth! Check her shop out if you need something for a little girl. Laura loves this barrette and it is totally in line with her sartorial commitment to peace.

That is what's going on with Laura's hair.  She was so eager to keep these curls that she hasn't bathed all weekend.  Delightful!

I hope y'all had a great Saturday and Sunday.  More soon. xo-B