Summer Is On Like Donkey Kong

Oh my Lord are your kids still in school? That is so two-thousand-late. We have been having summer vacation for two days. You better hurry, 'cause we're using it all up.

For Laura, the end of fourth grade was marked by the usual foofaraw, class party and such. At the party, which was held outside, she won Second Place in the hula hooping contest.

Intensity!

It reminded me of how, once when I was in college, there was some kind of luau in the dining hall, with shrimp skewers and such, and I too won Second Place in a hula hooping contest. To achieve that level of excellence, I had to hula hoop for like 20 minutes. But Matt's ex-girlfriend hula hooped a little bit longer and won First Place.

Let us say no more about that.

ANYHOO, Laura's class had a nice party. And one mom had on a nice black satin strapless romper shorts outfit. It was an odd choice. She also had on high heeled sandals, which was cute, but her balance was imperiled by her gigantor Louis Vuitton hobo with gold hardware. You know, breezy. Keepin' it breezy for the kids' little party.

Then, in keeping with our tradition, Normal Neighbor and one of the K(C)athies and I ambushed the kids getting off the bus with squirt guns and water balloons. We agreed that it was our most fun squirtgun raid in years. I think it was more fun because the Livingston boys from down the street are now big enough that it didn't feel like just squirting some tiny kids in the face. Not that I wouldn't do that. But this year all the kids were big enough to effectively run away and/or seize weapons and fight back. Even Hank got into it. Last year he clutched a full Super Soaker to his chest, but never fired his gun. Just like one of those soldiers in the Great War.

Then we took all the kids to this frozen yogurt place where you serve yourself yogurt and toppings and pay by the ounce. When it was time to weigh in, Laura's cup cost $6. I knew that would happen--I saw it coming--and I let it. My friend K(C)athy was all, "Oh you let her fix her own? DUMMY." But then she has six kids.

Riding in the car, Laura told me that she feels guilty to leave fourth grade. I said, "Guilty? Honey, what do you mean?" She said that thought it was one of her best years. I said, "You know that 'guilt' means an awareness that you've done something wrong? You might feel sad to leave fourth grade, but you do not feel guilty."  She assured me that she knew what "guilt" meant and that she nonetheless feels like she "shouldn't be leaving." Who knows. I opened my mouth to tell her that was crazy talk, then I realized that I knew exactly what she meant. I felt guilty to leave Santa Cruz five years ago, even though it was absolutely the right move, and not a situation in which guilt should play a role. Then I realized I am raising myself.

Since then we have been swimming and lounging, and Laura's already been to a sleepover, and today while we were out, the dog found a piece of watermelon on the coffee table and decided to chew it to death all over the white sheepskin rug. So, summer. It is on.

What y'all doing? Any fun end-of-school traditions?